chatting.

A few days after I shared the tazkirah, a very dear sister contacted me telling how she wishes to be as firm as umar. I told her it’s not easy to be one. You’ll have to bear all the consequences in order to become an umar. Why? Because we don’t have the capacities to be like him. Allah has created us beautifully unique and different from each other. Even if we can be as firm as umar, other people might not be able to be as patience as the rest of the sahabah.

She finally told me about the problem. Ukhuwwah. Hmm..

Akhawat are creatures of Allah but they are not angels. Even with the title ‘akhawat’ itself, that doesn’t guarantee they are pure and free from sin. Akhawat are normal human beings that also have wrongdoings (with the hope that they know it and make amend).

I feel you dear sister. And I am pretty sure everyone else also has or will face the trials and tribulations of ukhuwwah along this journey. But one thing to be made clear, bear in mind and being reminded again and again. Why do we want to be in this path at the first place? Is it because of the sweetness of ukhuwwah? Is it? Or is it solely because of Allah?

Mujahadah. Each and every one of us has our own mujahadah. Try to keep our intentions in doing things for the sake of Allah. It’s not easy I know. But we want jannah right? Do we have other choices then?

I feel you. Being me, I honestly like my things to be in control. I like the idea of being punctual. I don’t like messy thing, I love it when things around me are clean and neat. And you know? Allah tested me with that. In fact I think He is until now. And frankly I’m still struggling to keep the right intention. I always have friends that do not like to clean things even if that’s their own. I always have friends that only mind their own businesses. The list can go longer with this. And I have to say not only friends, but even akhawat. The so called people that I look up to that gets tarbiyah and do dakwah. The one that to my logic and comprehension (previously) should have taken care of their 10 muwasofat tarbiyah. The one that should be the good ambassadors of islam. But eventually not everyone is as what I expected. Again, akhawat are still normal creatures. They have flaws. I have flaws!

Ighfirli Ya Rabb..
T_T

My naqibah used to ask us. Why do we do the things that we do? (the good things of course). Is it because we like it or because Allah likes it? Is it because of Allah or because of our interest only? It stroked me hard. I really hope that everything that I do is only to get mardhatillah and not due to my own self-satisfaction.

I love you dear ukhti. Let’s battle our ways through all these. Allah The Most Knowing and The Seer of All will value our mujahadah, insyaAllah..