Monday, May 29, 2017


I have many regrets in life. Some say regretting is nothing good as it shows how much you are not believing in fate. Qadr. But I on the other hand do regretting some things. Reasons being, that is the way I appreciate all that happened. For me to contemplate and improve myself. For me to learn and be grateful of everything despite those good and not so good. Alhamdulillah 'ala kulli haal.

"Saying, 'Ask forgiveness from your Lord; for He is Oft-Forgiving; "'He will send rain to you in abundance; "'Give you increase in wealth and sons; and bestow on you gardens and bestow on you rivers (of flowing water)"


Ya Allah! You are my Lord, there is no god but You. You created me and I am Your slave, I uphold Your pledge and evil that I have committed. I acknowledge Your blessing upon me and I acknowledge my sin. So forgive me, for none can forgive sins except You.

Sunday, May 14, 2017

Of curry puffs and a Sunday.

Young people needs to learn patience. As I grow older, I treasure that patience is acquired, nurtured and very practical. I valued that patience, the same as wisdom, is priceless. Some things will mellow down with time, but some others will just clearly build up.

Quoted from among my most-referred scholar,

Sabr is not remaining quiet and allowing anger to build up inside you. Sabr is to talk about what's bothering you without losing control of your emotions.

Patience or sabr is just one thing. Inevitably I have a lot more to learn. Today, mak and I made curry puffs. To be honest, mak did most of the things. I just learn the kelim (folding the edges to seal). As expected, the curry puffs turned out to be as below. Mine is on the top, maks is of course the latter one.

Again, did I really ever learn anything today? Sure. Not only making curry puffs. Not only patience. I learn to realise that I have so many sides that I will need to improve, that I may not be ready to be someone's partner in any time soon, let alone be a mother. But I am sure to want to be one someday. In the end, I realise that Allah's plan is the best and I will always try to be grateful of all the things He blessed me with. Alhamdulillah 'ala kulli haal.

Today I decided not to wish mak mother's day. I might not tell her, but I wish she know that I am just very very very grateful to have her as my mother. Of all the things she said and did, say and do, will say and do, I always love her and admire her. She is indeed not perfect, but she is my bench mark to my future self and she will always be the love of my life.

No wish today, but a longer prayer for you, mak. May Allah grant all my wish. Allahumma ameen.